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The “Masters of the Universe” Drinking Game

May also be used for “Tarzan and the Super Seven.” In fact, pretty much anything produced by Filmation in the early ’80s.

Warning! As with most anything derived from college (Berkeley, natch), this is incredibly sexist.

  1. The first time a hero does his remarkable transformation from his mild-mannered alter ego, take a drink. Feel free to shout “By the power of Greyskull!”
  2. Any blatant sexual tension, take a drink. Take two if it’s between two characters of the same gender.
  3. If a character falls and does a complicated somersault to cushion the blow, take a drink.
  4. If an action sequence is repeated in the same episode (possibly flipped horizontally), take a drink. If the scene involves a somersault, you must take two: one for the somersault and one for the repeated scene.
  5. If a character does a high-speed run by leaning forward at an impossible 45° angle, take a drink. Take another if he passes an animal normally associated with speed (gazelle, cheetah, &c).
  6. If a woman appears on the screen with disproportionately large thighs, everyone must shout “Thunder Thighs!” Failing to do so incurs the penalty of taking a drink.
  7. Any long pans or aerial sweeps over sparkling water must be accompanied by everyone saying “Ooooh, pretty!” Penalty for not doing so is just a sip.
  8. “Masters of the Universe” only: Any time the Queen shows that she alone has full knowledge of what’s going on, yell “Woman got brains!” and drink.
  9. The first time Orko, Nikita, Bat-Mite, or any other Filmation-inspired sidekick shows up, everyone must shout “Fucker!” as loud as possible. Failure to do so (this one is easy to remember, folks!) involves a chug. Repeated shouting during the remainder of the episode is encouraged but not required.
  10. If a character throws back his head to laugh heartily, take a drink. Take two if it’s a fade-to-black transition to the final commercial break.
  11. Finally, during the last commercial (you did tape the commercials, right?) have everyone write down what they think the moral of the episode will be. Everyone who guesses wrong… chug! (Warning: may cause alcohol poisoning on one specific “He-Man” episode.)

This is all from memory, as I can’t seem to find the original list, lovingly printed out on a dot-matrix printer attached to my long-gone Apple ][.

Last Modified: 2005/04/03 10:14:53 GMT
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