the room is very cold there is fjdklsrioe iorudlf eiorudlsifj oeu rioe fdsnlkafjeio jdlkfjeio jfdslfj ewo cats run with sicsoiores i am tired i am bored i need to get laid oh lord ifjdl ioerjfdl rfeiwj u jklsds hjkncs who gives a flying brown rats ass about any of this, i have mice. I don't like mice
there are white birch and black spruce, it is a forested wetland, so you need a permit to place any fill in it. Black spruce in a wetland look like shit, they are all nasty and white and have hardly any branches or needles, there is also bog birch, which isn't so bad.
The path is filled with moose, big moose, little moose, mama moose, baby moose. It is fairly wide, but with the moose who can get by. I try anyway, and I am bludgeoned to death by a mama moose trying to protect her baby. Then the daddy moose steps on my head it hurts. Then the hikers come and the moose attack them, so I crawl to a tree to finish dying.
It is a big anadromous river. Salmon frolic up and down the river. Oh, shit, there are the bears, trying to catch the salmon. A baby bear runs up and rubs against my leg...oh, shit. I turn to run away, but everyone knows that fuckin bears can run like 40 miles/hr, so the mama catches me and tears my head off. Oh, and the water was ok, it wasn't polluted, but it was white because of the runoff from glaciers.
The cup is small, it looks like a hollowed out coconut. How strange. I look around, and there is Gilligan, oh, my, how did I get to the desert island? This is really very strange. Gilligan has accidentally fucked up the operations YET AGAIN and they can't leave the island. I agree to help and take them back with me on my personal helicopter, but then the hurricane comes and I am thrown against a tree and die. I'm starting to get pissed. Oh, and the coconut was painted purple...who fucking brought lead based paint on a 3 hour tour?
The key is very much key like. It has a top and a bottom. I see the chest sitting next to the key, and like a genius, I figure thats what the key unlocks. I unlock the chest, and see diamonds and gold and rubies and all precious jewels. OK, I actually see a large pile of shit. Apparently shit was the currency of the person that hid the chest in the woods and brilliantly left the key right fucking next to it.